The middle

Well I ended the last blog talking about the first night I cheated. I haven’t talked about it since then. There’s so much to it I just don’t know where to go.

When I got offered my store I thought it was going to be a few states away and I would never see the OM again. As it turned out he became my boss. So needless to say we continued on the phone all the time. Night and day. All hours. Tons of messages tons calls. We saw each other bare minimum once a month. Not every time did we have sex but a good portion of the time we did. We had monthly manager meetings and that’s why we saw each other then. He also come to my store to do his AOM duties every other week. Most of the time he skipped my store and would only come every three to four weeks.

Him and I got closer and closer. He was like my best friend. The closer I got to him the meaner I got to my husband.

On a side note. It’s strange to say this but I still had guilt about things. For instance he would say mean stuff about his wife and I would defend her. I don’t understand it myself but I did. If he would say things about my husband I would correct him and wouldn’t let him talk about him. I would always defend his wife and my husband. I know how weird that sounds. My husband believes we would laugh about him and joke. And it’s simply not true. The OM and I would not talk about him. I would occasionally say stuff like he’s being a jerk today. Or I really pissed him off today. But that’s as far as it went. It was off limits to talk about them.

Time went on and I knew that the OM was lying to me about things but I never wanted to believe it. I mean come on why would he lie to me ( I’m Being sarcastic) during one of my conversations with my husband about the OM I stated that I never lied to the OM. My husband took that to mean something totally different then what I meant. What I meant was I always told the OM I was never leaving my husband. Which my husband now uses that piece of information against me. I really never thought the affair would turn into as long as it did or with so many feelings. I don’t know what I was thinking or why I would think that it would just be done and over and no would know. Actually no one would have known if I hadn’t told.

Well one day the OM got really sick and ended up in the hospital and while he was there his wife went through his phone. Of course she found a lot of calls and messages. She also found some pics of me in his phone. She called me that day. I didn’t know what to say to her, I told her the truth. I told her all the things he had told me about their relationship. I let her yell at me and say whatever she wanted. Who was I to say anything back to her. I never got angry. We talked about 3 times that day. She told me that I wasn’t the only one he was seeing. I believed her. When I questioned the OM about it of course he had a ton of excuses. Some of them sounded legit. I knew they were lies. But I wanted to believe him. We didn’t talk much after that. About 2 months went by and the calls started again. Shortly after that he was no longer my boss and I only saw him at the meetings. He went to another area.

The OM and his wife got a divorce. Which he stated from the beginning that they were getting a divorce so I wasn’t surprised.

I started to hate living two lives. That’s what I was doing for years. I lived two lives. I didn’t know who I was anymore. Things I never thought I would do I was doing. I started talking the OM less. But I missed our friendship. I wouldn’t make time to go see him because I knew what it entailed. When I went to the manager meetings I made sure I had plans with the other managers so I had an excuse not to meet with him. We still talked on the phone and texted.

The OM begged me to come see him and couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t. So he told me he was lonely and wanted to start dating. I told him to do it. I was fine with it. He would call me and tell me about his dates. Which I would listen and talk to him about it. By this time my husband had moved back to where we lived before this job. About 3 1/2 hours away. I would go see my husband every other weekend and on the opposite ones he would come to my house.

Yes I still talked to the OM I just wouldn’t go see him or make any time for him. Yes I know that’s just as bad. But in my mind at the time I seen it as that part of our relationship was over and we were just friends. It’s laughable now when I think about it. Really. You can be friends with him still. No. Not at all.

I will end this one here. I’ll finish up the story on my next blog.


3 thoughts on “The middle”

  1. Thank you for this post. My husband repeatedly said he didn’t talk dirt about me to the skank. He said I was psycho and thought maybe it was menopause LOL, but he said he never talked bad about me. I know she trashed her ex husband to him which was part of the reason why he felt bad for her and was defensive of her. After all, she endured decades of being married to this awful guy, terrible father, cheapskate and to top it off, he had a little dick (she put that in her divorce interrogatories). She told my husband stories of his neglect, bad parenting etc, that my husband said she couldn’t possibly have made up (roll eyes). She claimed HE was having an affair, yet SHE had the burner phone to talk to a guy she met on a vacation without her ex.

    Sorry, I’m rambling. The point is, I never really totally believed he didn’t trash me, but after reading your post, perhaps he didn’t…

    xoxo Dolly

    Liked by 1 person

    1. For me and maybe for your husband too it wasn’t about bad mouthing my husband. I bonded with him and had a friendship. I didn’t want him to talk bad about my husband nor did I want to. It was a strange “forbidden” relationship of friendship and well sex of course. Maybe it was the excitement of it. Or the forbidden. But it of course wore off.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. I think they bonded between her divorcing and us not getting along. He says the sex was not good at all and she would say he needed to get me out of his head. She supposedly told him he could move in with her and once he got me out of his head, the sex would improve… He told me he had never intended to move in with her.

        Liked by 1 person

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