Poor OW???

I just read a blog from a while ago talking about how the OW write these blogs wanting people to feel sorry for them. Basically it was a blog about why should we feel sorry for it you choose it. The comments were pretty much the same. Well I agree with all of you.

I want NO sympathy at all. Pardon the pun but I made my bed and now I must lie in it. It’s a horrible bed. Not only was I the OW but I was also married and he was the OM. Fucking pathetic. I want NO sympathy. The only thing I want is to maybe not feel pain everyday just a few times a month. I don’t want it to go away completely. It keeps you grounded and humbled. I do however want no more pain for my husband at least as less as possible. And less triggers for him would be nice.

Even being the OW I still feel like them talking about their “feelings” and how they are “lonely” is rich. Get over yourself.

Even though the OM in my story did divorce his wife, I still think about her and what I put her through and her kids. It’s sickening. It’s awful. I can never make it right or make amends. She has moved on and I believe she is happy now but at what cost did she have to go through to get that happiness. Hell she thought she had it with her husband. I do believe the OM has had more than just the one affair with me. I also believe he probably still is on his new wife. Maybe not. But even if he was gonna have an affair on his wife with or without me. It should have been without me.

So for the “OW” to sit around and talk about it like they deserve something, they don’t. Well maybe a throat punch. But that’s about it.

I’ll end this right here. I think you all get my feelings on this subject.


6 thoughts on “Poor OW???”

  1. Yes you made a bad choice, but you certainly deserve more respite from this pain than just a few times a month hun. This was not a mistake, it was a choice, but that doesn’t mean you deserve to be unhappy forever and ever. You deserve happiness and love, just like the rest of us.

    I love how you feel about the OW’s pity party 😉 I’m curious about something though – as much as you hate and are disgusted by what you did, do you still have fond memories and loving feelings for your affair partner?

    Liked by 4 people

    1. I can honestly say I have NO fond memories or loving feelings towards the OM. I have realized it wasn’t real. None of it. It’s was all lies. I got wrapped up in it all and thought at the time I loved him. I didn’t. He wasn’t a real man. Which sounds funny for me to say because I was doing the same thing as him. Honestly I wasn’t being a real wife, mother or just a real female at that time. The OM has no dignity or honor. Not like my husband.
      When I look back now it makes me sick just to hear his name. I try not to look back. I definitely do not day dream about what went on. I know it happened but it doesn’t seem real when I think back. It’s like watching a movie happen and it’s not me. I obviously know it was me. But it’s so surreal.

      Liked by 3 people

  2. While I was in the affair I went all out for him. I sacrificed a lot. Well everything for this “love”. Which is all my husband sees now. I wish he could understand that I don’t love the OM.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Look, being the OM or OW is not pretty but if you are truly sorry -show it and live it. It will never be forgotten but it will eventually be forgiven or at least not brought up.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. No it’s not pretty at all. See the showing it and living it thing kind of has me baffled. Now I know your probably giving me the wtf look right now. Let me explain. Everything I have is wide open to my husband. Passwords phones emails. Everything. I do the little things. Snuggle show affection to let him know I care. The response I get it is it still feels the same like when you cheated except the OM isn’t here anymore. How do you overcome that?

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Its not ALL on you. Yes you cheated and that was pretty much all on you – however, your husband has to let you live it down if he wants to continue on with your marriage. If its all out there – try not to talk about it anymore or maybe set certain times when its ok to talk about. If you are truly doing everything you should, being open and honest, showing your husband love, then it is up to him to allow you to do that and him be somewhat vulnerable without throwing it in your face. Baby steps till the trust builds again. You know what you did – he doesnt have to remind you. If he cant feel the love anymore for you, then the relationship is dead. If he can accept what you did, I mean, he obviously doesnt have to like it, then he needs to allow you to show him that you are sorry, you love him (if you do) and you both can move past the destruction of what you did. Maybe there is just too much damage and he just doesnt have that love connection with you anymore. Only he knows that answer. Good luck girl, shit aint easy.

    Liked by 1 person

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